Funky Speaks v2.0

I was recently conversing with a student at my old school and he mentioned something interesting to me. My blog is blocked by their firewall application. I was ecstatic.

Now I have no idea how SonicWall actually works, but I like to believe that someone manually added my website to a blacklist. Someone out there at SonicWall HQ said to himself: “This site is not appropriate for workplace consumption!”

I am fully aware that it probably triggers some auto-block due to the mentioning of videogame related terms on the site, but the fantasy that I’m important enough to be actually blocked by a real person makes me happy.

Please let me have my delusions of grandeur.

There is no doubt in my mind that you are aware of my ongoing campaign to unearth secrets behind Barack HUSSEIN Obama’s run for presidency of the United States of America (god bless it).

Now, for people on the internet, Hussein, besides Ron Paul, is probably the most popular candidate. These Obamabots have rigged almost every internet poll there is in favor of Hussein.

However, I have discovered the key to his popularity. See that screenshot up there? That is completely undoctored and taken from the popular electronic game Guitar Hero II for the Microsoft Xbox three-hundred-and-sixty.

I have it on good authority that “Yes we can” is the most popular song in the game. And that just happens to be Hussein’s slogan? Coincidence, I think not!

We must spread the word about this hideous copyright infringement and slander and libel that Hussein is spreading. To arms, my people!

The easiest, and probably the most unflattering way, to describe Krause is as “a Dutch Peaches”. Electroclashy music with overtly sexual lyrics, sounds familiar, no? The only thing missing is the gender-bender quality.

Still, what little patriotism I have forces me to say that what I’ve heard is as good as Peaches. Still don’t have her debut EP because it’s only available online via vinyl. Seriously, get some iTunes up in here.

The vinyl is eye-scorchingly pink though, so that I’ll probably buy it anyway. Strictly for ironical purposes of course.

EA announced its European release and pricing for Rock Band today.

For the actual math you’ll have to read that article but the bottom line is we’ll be paying $380 for the same thing (divided in two packages for some unknown reason) Americans are getting for $169. That’s quite a price increase.

I’ve sent an email to Harmonix (because EA and Viacom, the cowards, don’t have public e-mail addresses, just forms) asking for a clarification. I’ve informed of the (obvious) internet backlash and just asked the simple question: Why? I just want to know why it’s so much more expensive. And I’m not going to believe any crap about VAT and transportation either. That shouldn’t add up to so much.

Especially considering we’re getting it months after the US.

Charlton Heston is dead.

We’ll be exhuming your corpse to pry that rifle from your cold dead hands now.

This post was mostly inspired by this blog post and the comments on Flickr photos by Justine Ezarik and Jason Calacanis. These sycophantic, bordering on creepy comments.

Let’s take this photo for example.

Has such wonderful comments as these:

May I massage those lil’ piggies for you por favor? Virtual Cabana Boy at your servicio. Fantastico!

Yay, creepy! There’s also the refreshingly honest:

nice legs

Though, if you’re going to complement a lady, you might want to think about using using capitalization and punctation. It’s the 21st century form of chivalry.

And finally a comment I don’t really get, it seems like it’s some half-hearted attempt at making a joke, but the only real hint towards that is the fact that there’s a “lol” at the end.

Seems to be really difficult to take that photo…. well……. maybe not lol

If you browse more of Ms. Ezarik’s photos, you can find a wealth of creepy internet stalkers.

Now, there’s another example of annoying internet commenters and those are the ones who are infatuated with Jason Calacanis’ bulldogs. Now, just between you and me, Jason, you dogs are fucking ugly. Look at this:

Look at that Jason. That’s an ugly fucking dog. Now, I’m no fan of president Bush, but he has better taste in dogs than Mr. Calacanis over here.

Look at the cute little doggie woggie. He’s like a little tank, you can’t see his feet so there might be some treads under that furry covering. Oh, and he has a little bit of snow on his face, just above his beard. ^_^